Three weeks ago, I learned that my dear friend, Rivkah Sweedler, transitioned successfully through her death with dignity event. She lived her last decades on Orcas Island. A beloved recluse, writer, poet, friend, mother, sister, grandmother, historian, wilderness skills mentor, and spiritual wise woman extraordinaire, she became the calm in my storm of an unwieldy divorce many years ago. After that, we became inspiration for one another, through the inevitable challenges that life, particularly island life, can bring.
Rivkah (75) was diagnosed in April (2022) with an aggressive stage of lymphoma. In keeping with her privacy and solitary nature, she chose no medical interventions. Her family and friends came close in loving support and protected her desire to die with dignity. Surrounded by her daughters and a life partner, she slipped into the in-between realm at mid-day on Sunday, July 31st. Her last breath was just before 7 pm PST. I took the opportunity yesterday to drive one of her favorite routes --- as a private memoriam --- through the Chuckanut scenic by-way, on route 11. It's a dozen miles of high cliffs, abundant trees and trails, along sea coastal curves so unique to Washington's beauty.
When I drove for Rivkah over the years, she always had me take this route back from our Bellingham excursions. We'd pack a picnic. She would relate a story or two from her life. I would sketch. Since I never took that trip with anyone else, it was the first time I drove it on my own. The moment I passed the first state park sign, I felt the echo of Rivkah's presence beside me. I could hear her voice and her laugh. She was instrumental in supporting my artistic endeavors, igniting that spark when I was overwhelmed with being a divorced mother and running a local business. I spent precious retreat hours in her yurt, when it was perched beside the more remote Moran State Park trails. She was a loyal companion to Applegate, until he too, died. And then she resiliently found another lovely place to set up her off the grid home, in the Obstruction Pass area of Orcas Island.
I am still tearing up in my cherished memories of Rivkah's presence in my life and her early influence mentoring wilderness skills with my children. She loved deeply and honestly. Her intuitive perceptions were remarkably candid and something I valued. I had forgotten that her birth name was Ruth, which happens to be my mother's name, too. My mother died in 2013, from complications of alcohol dependency and an associated form of dementia. Circumstances in my upbringing made me responsible for our household of five --- when I was only11 years old. I essentially home-taught myself and Rivkah helped me to value the qualities I gained from those early years. Her mental clarity stayed sharp until she closed her eyes on her last day. I loved her and will continue to love her.
I realize that Rivkah has her own daughters and grandchildren who carry her legacy in their DNA. I will always consider myself one of her blessed friends and 'almost daughter' kindred relations. I hope my life will continue to reflect the lessons she taught me. Perhaps I have inherited a kind of spiritual DNA from Rivkah, since there was no such legacy passed down from my own parents. On the day of her death I received notice that I was to vacate my tiny home on or before August 29th.
Therefore, this is my last week as a resident on San Juan Island. Packing up my household has me reflecting on the cycles and nature of change. It's openings and pathways, its influences and connections. Its gains and losses. When I read the unexpected email with the final notice, and there had been no other notices or discussions on the matter, I was in Santa Rosa, California. I was participating in one of the hands-on residency/workshop portions of my reflexology training. From there I was booked to go to Midland, Texas, for a "Food is Medicine" summit. Then spend a week in Adair County, Iowa, assisting with my sister and brother-in-laws organic farm succession planning. What this meant, as far as logistics of my move, is that I would have less than two weeks to pack up before hauling my household to Sonoma County, California.
Fortunately, I had some tentative work and housing in progress while I was away. These were able to be confirmed and accelerated, to accommodate my change in timing. I already had an intention of relocating in June of 2023. Once I got over the shock of such an abrupt notice of rental termination, I focused on what's possible in the present. Within 48 hours, I had a confirmed house/pet sitting assignment for six weeks, a reflexology position set up with TrueNorth Health, starting in November. My youngest sister, in Fairfield, California, offered her home as a landing pad in September --- so I could work out the rest of the details on that end.
Here is the home I have enjoyed for 15 months. It is a 400 sq ft tiny home on a normal foundation, with a loft and an exterior porch. I added a portable raised garden bed, so ill be breaking that down and taking it with.
Eventually, my wish is to live in a cluster of small homes on a community land trust (CLT), where I can share in a community garden and orchard and small community lifestyle. There is a recently formed CLT in Sebastopol, which is where I hope to land, ultimately. I have already become a member of CommonSpace CLT. For a sneak preview, please follow this link: http://www.commonspaceclt.org/home/projects/
My curiosity at seeing how to things unfold in Sonoma County is stronger than the occasional fears that crop up at such a big change. I have been a California resident before, but not in Northern California. The farthest north I have lived was on the University of Santa Cruz campus, which is where my twins were born. They just turned 25 in May! The transitional, non-certified organic orchard I managed was in San Luis Obispo County --- which is where my youngest daughter was born. In our hand-sewn yurt. We were in a homesteading and homeschooling phase. My oldest son was born when I was completing my AA degree at Cuesta College, also in San Luis Obispo County.
Even though I was born in Iowa and have lived in several other states, I became acquainted with the following places in CA because of my mother (LA born and raised), a former husband, and several relatives on my step-father's side. Los Angeles, Bakersfield, Taft, Corona/Riverside, Madera, Fresno, and Atascadero.
The link to Sonoma County is because of my participation in a 40-day medically supervised water fasting program, at the TrueNorth Health Center in Santa Rosa. Earlier posts to this blog covered the gradual stages of my lifestyle changes, and becoming fully vegan again in the process. I did a lot of veggie juicing and raw foods --- in preparation for the fast. I posted a few times on FB regarding the progression through the fast itself. I will repeat here that the fast and refeeding protocol is the most powerful and loving gift I have ever given myself. I continue to be transformed by it.
More to come!
